I’m becoming more and more convinced that the Lord gives us children in order to teach us more about Himself. To allow glimpses of His infinite wisdom in our finite experiences.
Let’s start with my Little One.
This past Christmas was a bit of an emotional roller coaster for her. Day after day she expressed a deep desire for two very specific Lego sets. (Let me just say that Lego Ninjago knew exactly what it was doing by coming out even remotely close to Christmas.)
I can’t tell you how many times we talked about those two sets. We looked them up on every online supplier just to see if they were still in stock and who had them for cheaper. We had to convince her not to spend every single cent she had, plus some of her sister’s, to buy it for herself before Christmas ever came. Those Lego sets were the thing of dreams.
So of course, they were wrapped under the tree just waiting for the great reveal!
Then, with only about a week left until Christmas, she informs us that she has asked Santa for … an Elf on the Shelf.
What??!?!! Excuse me? Where did this come from?!
And for about 1,000 different reasons, that’s not happening. As we lovingly explained to her that fact, she was crushed.
But why? Why was she crushed? Because all of her friends have one and she feels left out. I’m so sorry kiddo, but that’s not reason enough.
Here it comes folks. The Great God Moment.
She goes to bed, still upset, and I think to myself, “If she could just be patient for a few more days… What is already coming for her is so much better than a silly little doll. It’s all she’s been dreaming of!”
I kid you not, I just felt like God was looking right over my shoulder going, “Yep. I know what you mean. It’s kind of like that dream that you’ve had. You know, they one that you sit and talk to me about for hours on end? But didn’t you also get upset with Me when I didn’t give you this other odd-ball thing that just popped into your head out of nowhere? If you could only be patient for a little longer, what you have coming is so much better than you can imagine.”
You can bet that one hit me hard.
But God didn’t stop there. I’ve got two daughters and He planned on using both of them.
My Oldest is basically a crazy cat lady in training. I’m pretty sure she wants an indoor cat more than most people want their favorite sport team to win the championship. The desire consumes her.
Unfortunately, it’s not going to happen. It’s not like we haven’t gone down the road of animals. We have. And we have learned that we are not good animal parents. It’s for the good of everyone, animal included, that we don’t bring a cat home. It isn’t that I like to see her upset, I just know that it’s for the best.
And I’ve had to tell her that time after time, after time. She just won’t give it up.
In fact, just the other day, when she began acting weird about going out of town, I finally got her to come clean that what she really wanted was to go by the Pet Store.
To which I said, “No.” That wouldn’t be fair to her since it wouldn’t end the way she wanted. I was trying to spare her feelings, really. But it didn’t work.
Turn on the tears. And the wailing. And the gnashing of teeth.
Here it comes y’all.
I looked at her and said, “I am not the cause of your pain. You are. You allow yourself to have hope that there’s a chance I will change my mind. But I don’t. I don’t change. My answer is always the same, and for reasons you don’t want to hear. This pain comes from your failure to accept my answer.”
Oh goodness! There’s God, right over my shoulder again saying, “Tell me about it! It’s kind of like that thing you keep asking Me for even though you know almost as much as I do that it’s not the right thing for you. My answer has never changed, only your ability to accept it.”
Okay. Okay, I got it. Well, I mean, I think I got it.
God has a plan. He’s got a plan for me. He’s got a good plan for me.
Can I please just trust Him? Can I trust His timing? Can I trust Him when He closes doors? Can I trust that He hears me? That He sees me? That He loves me?
Can I trust that He loves me enough to keep me on the path that He has for me even when I get as distracted as a dog chasing a squirrel??
Man, I’m trying.
But if I forget again, at least He has two beautiful girls to use to help remind me.
Lord, please help me keep days of waiting from becoming days of doubt. You are the God of split seas and crumbled walls, I know that You are ABLE! Keep my eyes on YOU!